I ended up working through my second pregnancy and had plans to work a few hours a week after the baby was born, but a move and new job for Mr. W allowed for my coming home.
I'm sure I needed to learn this lesson this way, for when the times have come that I've considered going back to work, whether due to Maryhelen-itis setting in, or because I thought we could use the money, my heart tugs me back home again (as does the feeling that it just wouldn't be the right place for me to be).
Based on the example I had in my own mother ~ who went back to work when my brother was 6mos old (this was 1969) because she was BORED at home ~ and in light of my original career plans, feeling this much emotion wasn't what I expected.
I am a firm believer that as much as we plan our lives, the Lord also has a plan. Can I just say that I love the fact that Heavenly Father and I are both planners!
The plan the Lord has for us is full of what we need to become who he needs us to be. It is a plan that stretches us and builds us in ways that are bigger than anything we might ever come up with on our own. A great story reads something to the effect of how we work to build a little shack (with our lives), where the Lord builds a mansion.
As overwhelming as days can be with five very busy children and a fabulously busy Mr. Wonderful, I have great peace in knowing that I am in the right place, doing what I need to be doing. And because it's where I need to be, it's also where I want to be, looking for ways to doing my work better and to be the person I want/need/ought to be in order to do my work very well.
Not every day is deemed a success, but with Heavenly Father's guidance and help, I am living a full life ~ full of all I never wanted, but am so grateful I have.