Thursday, October 17, 2013

Getting To Know Yourself

I've always had a struggle with feeling refreshed, even after a relaxing evening with my husband or girl friends. Even after a quiet afternoon when the babies are napping and I've been able to complete a thought and accomplish things around the house. Even after a whole week's vacation away from real life.

And I didn't know why none of those things left me feeling like I was ready to jump back in and tackle my responsibilities.

You always seem to hear that these kinds of things are the stuff people seek when they're looking to relieve the stress in their lives. And they seem to work for other people...

Why not me?

I honestly don't know the answer to that, but what I have discovered is that there is a way to find out what works for each of us, when the things the world offers just aren't working.

Our family situation currently sees five little people scoot out the door throughout the day to school. The youngest scooter leaves for the afternoon to attend Kindergarten, leaving baby brother and I at home. Alone. (insert the hallelujah chorus here)

He takes a nice long nap during that time, giving me a prime opportunity to replenish my personal stores and be ready for the evening dashing. 

But I was finding that closing my eyes for a few minutes or catching up on emails while listening to the money guy on the radio or folding laundry while watching a favorite "mommy" show, wasn't leaving me the kind of refreshed I wanted it to. All of those things are wonderful and I enjoy each of them, but I was looking for more.

So, in a certain kind of frustration that comes from doing what you know should be working but isn't actually working, I started talking to God. 

"Lord, what should I do? What is right for me?"

The answer came quickly. It, in and of itself, is less important than the fact that it came, but what I heard was "you need quiet".

I knew what that meant ~ it was more than just the background quiet I was enjoying with everyone off doing their own things. I needed the kind of quiet that comes from stillness, from sitting, pondering, listening to both my heart and the voice of the Lord in my mind. 

All of this happened not very long ago, but I'm so impressed with the results already. 

And I LOVE how we can continually get to know ourselves, by conversing with the One who knows us perfectly. 

I am sure that the Lord is in the details of our lives and that His concern for us reaches to every nook and cranny and thought and care and concern that we might have. 

He loves us and we have access to His power, simply by asking.